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When Eli was born he had some serious complications; lung disease, some bleeding in the brain, and a cyst in his small intestine, but those challenges were nothing compared to the life, spirit, peace and love that we saw in that tiny body. Over the coming weeks we got to experience what it's like to care for someone without reservation. Heather was the perfect and complete mom; I did my best to keep up and learn to be a dad. We quickly schooled ourselves in the terminology of the nursery ICU, she studied the capability of the nurses (she hand picked only the best), and we quickly reviewed and studied up on anatomy and physiology. Our time at St. Joseph's Hospital NICU was scary, educational, horrifying, happy, more education, more fear, but ultimately we feel that it was fun to be the parents of this content little dimpled smiley guy. I won't chronicle all of the ups and downs during the weeks that followed, but Eli made it thru two surgeries, two infections, good days, bad days, and countless scares before having three very good days in a row. We were scared but optimistic about an upcoming surgery when things went terribly wrong. Eli started experiencing internal hemorrhaging and difficulty breathing. The doctors and nurses gave their best efforts to stabilize Eli all night long. In the early morning he started having seizures and then coded. They managed to bring him through this entire traumatic event, but warned us that it would only get worse. Eli's little body was giving up even though his spirit was still strong. He had stayed awake looking into Heather's eyes and holding her hand for about five hours throughout the night. Even as we had to make a terrible decision, he was trying to see his mom. Our grief began when we chose for 'Eli's team' to give us some time with him and then remove him from the machines. The nurses placed Eli into Heather's arms, where for the rest of his life he would know only our love.
We had been excited about the adventure of our lives, but
unfortunately for us this adventure was going to be decades shorter than
it should have been. Eli died on August 30th, at 8:19 AM. Parenthood lasted
for ten weeks, six days, two hours and nineteen minutes before we had
to make the decision to give our son some peace and rest from his rapidly
failing body. Parenthood has ended, but we will be parents forever. This Web site is our chance to share Eli with you - it is so important for us to share this special little guy with the people in our lives. We are constantly amazed that someone so small and young touched so many people around the world. We have placed pictures, kind words that all of you have shared with us, a beautiful slideshow, tears and hugs on Eli's site. So many of you have asked how you can help and show support in this very difficult time in our lives, so we have placed links on this site for you to find out more information on how to make a donation. For us this is just another way Eli can still have influence in this life. We selected the Ronald McDonald House Charities of Phoenix and the St. Joseph's Nursery ICU because of the amazing support they both provided our family and all families in need. Please don't feel obligated in any way but know it is there if you want to make a donation in memory of Eli. Through the years we have had the grace or good luck, whichever you want to call it, to share some of our best and worst times with you all. This is our worst time, and we have one thing to ask. Please remember us in your prayers as we search for meaning, acceptance, and forgiveness (God's got some s'plainin' to do). However, know that Heather and I will as always go through this together with all of our love for one another and the caring support of our complete family, and we will smile...later. Please share this Web site with anyone and everyone you think would like to know about Eli and the amazing gift he has been in our world.
Thank you all for being in our lives
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